World's Fair 1964 New York

Sakura, my Chinese penpal asked me “Do you want to go to the EXPO?”  I asked her, “What expo are you talking about?”  She emailed back:  “You don't know World Expo?! It is held in Shanghai, China this year.”  This is what I emailed back:

No, I really didn't know anything about the World Expo.  In fact, the only world expo I ever attended was the World's Fair in NY, in the summer of 1964.  I was 13 and my junior high school took a field trip to it.  Honestly, all I remember about it was that a new boy had just started school and was a real hunk.  All the girls were smitten with him, including me, not only because he was awesomely cute but because he was from California, and so was I.  Although I was born in NY, California had become my home.  My mother had just died and my father brought us back to NY to be with his family, which was good for him, but my whole life was uprooted and I had not made any new friends yet.

So this new kid starts school and ends up sitting next to me in home room!  I thought for sure I would be able to get to know him now, but no, all his attention was on a girl that sat a few seats in front of us that he had a huge crush on.  He was always staring at her and wanting to be with her.  Well, she didn't like him, and asked me to stay with her at the fair and keep him away from her!  So, kind of the first friend I made hated this guy that I really liked and I was caught in the middle.  It was a very dramatic day for me, really liking this guy and having to keep him away from this other girl, who I was really glad to be making friends with.  :)  I can’t remember a single exhibition.

So , it never occurred to me to go to another world expo. Until you came along and asked me about it.  I apparently learned nothing on my school field trip.  Except that maybe not every boy I like will like me back and that friends can come to you in strange ways.  :)

Now that you bring it up, I think the exhibits are probably fascinating and mind expanding, and now I'm wondering why I don't travel the world and go to every single one of them?  In fact, I think I might be a volunteer for them when I retire.  What a great way to make new friends and see the world!  You may have given me a new interest in life, and one that totally fits in with my love of drawing, writing and being a general ambassador of world goodwill.  :)

I guess this is what penpals are all about.  They make the world smaller and make you realize how much wonderful stuff is in it.  :) 

I just googled “Expo 2010 Shanghai China” and the website is really beautiful:http://en.expo2010.cn/

And here is a video of what I apparently missed on my field trip in mythic times:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gPHbVY-Kq_A

My new car!

My credit union rep brought it over with a big red bow. How cute is that?? He wanted to take a picture of me with it for his “satisfied customer wall.”

David Sucks Day

Today was the first anniversary of David's passing from the physical plane to the non-physical plane. I called Barb (have I mentioned Barb on my blog yet? I don't remember, but she is, or was, David's best friend who scraped me up from the ground and took care of me when he died) and she said she was wondering why she was in a funk for a year and then remembered what day this was. Oh, she is also the person that watched him die with me. Anyway, we decided we were really mad at him, and from now on we are calling this David sucks day.

I woke up nauseated, wondering if I should call in sick? I ended up taking a couple of Tums and my favorite herbal remedy, went to work and bought a car! David would have loved that. Today was the day that my 5 week wait was over. My credit union finally found my first ever exactly-what-I-wanted (short of brand new) car!! I've been hauling around a Toyota Camry, a virtual tank. I keep bashing it into things and scraping it and denting it. I just wanted a nice small car that fit me so I could stop bashing up my car. And today I became the proud owner of a 2006 Toyota Corolla, 72K miles, silver, pristine accident record, only 2 previous owners, has power everything and cruise control (mandatory - I can drive "handicapped" when my hip acts up), tinted windows (the kind with a lifetime guarantee) and all sorts of extra interior/exterior protective add-ons, and I will be able to trade in my old car and get all the DMV paperwork done without ever having to leave my office or talk to an auto salesman! My credit union rocks!

Delivery on Friday!

A Wonderful Day

I decided I wanted to have a wonderful day today. I've been glum too long.


The music was nice driving to work, and a ladybug landed on my windshield.  I love that.


Then, there was a car blocking three (3) parking spaces when I got to my parking garage at work. I left a "YOU SUCK!!!" sign on that car. That felt good.


Then when I got to the doc center, I found this note on my chair:

So, I got a free breakfast!  Fantastic!


So, at work I had decided not to do any more of Fred Lowe's work, because he sends it back every time and tells me I messed it up.  It's easy not to do his work, because just last week he started sending his requests to EVERY regional center, although he is technically "ours."  He thought he was in hog heaven as there was always somebody ready to pick up his work right away.  Heh.  Once he even got the same job done twice, due to lack of communication between regions. Well, it's now Tuesday and NOBODY picked up his work today.  He managed to piss off every operator in every region in less than a week!  Watching his work rot in the email inbox felt great.


After a couple of hours he emailed to find out if anyone was working on his job?  My co-worker, of above free-breakfast-note fame, responded "no" in a very wordy way that made it sound like he would be serviced soon (a skill I have watched him develop over the years, and greatly admire).


We also all wonder what his secretary does, as she doesn't appear to do anything but read his emails, which he always copies her on. She also has nothing but complaints. We are all of us apparently too through with the pair of them.  It felt just great to have avoided a Fred Lowe job for an entire day.  Our evening operator finally picked up Fred's job (there are other users he hates more than Fred).


Oh, and on a forum I have been on for a couple of  years, one of the other members is quoting me in her signature.  I was really honored for the past few weeks since she did that.  Then today she said something really amazingly great, and I started to comment on it, when I just made it my signature instead, and I made it the same blue font she used for my quote in her signature.  That was one of those really inspired actions that always make you feel good all day after doing it.  Like all actions should be.  Oh, what she said was:  "Everywhere we have been has contributed to where we are going and no place seems more peaceful or joyous than where we are right now."  Another little "joke" we have going is that she and I will be the next forum romance.  Yes, I have been without a man for too long!!


When I got home I did the first of a series of belly dancing classes I recorded.  It was the perfect exercise to do in the 4 foot square space I have in my room.  It was really fun, not a bad workout, and a great way to dance without needing a partner, and to feel sexy without having a partner!


Dinner tonight will be a sandwich leftover from work yesterday, so I will be eating in the "freeconomy" today.  Yay!


And American Idol and Dancing with the Stars are on tonight!  I'll curl up with Lulu and fall asleep listening to her purrs.  It was a wonderful day and will be a wonderful evening.


And how was yours?

On Widowhood

After my husband died he filled me. He had loved me so much that the love he left behind just flowed through me unceasingly, and it was all that kept me going. And after a while I realized he was gone, and it wasn’t his love that was filling me up any more, it had become something else. It was divine, so I suppose you could say I found god’s love. It gave me strength, so I suppose you could say I found inner strength. Whatever it was, and Whoever it belonged to, it was unrecognizable to me. It was Someone or Something I had never seen or felt or heard before. I had no words to describe it. It was a Zen koan. It was a riddle I must solve, and I knew the answer would blow my mind when I finally figured it out. It did. The answer was one word long. The answer was: Me.

David and I and God and Everyone Else and Mother Nature and Infinite Intelligence and Divine Love and Cosmic Energy and All Life and Jesus and Yahweh and Your Supreme Being of Choice all met my Inner Being and we became One: Me. I found Me for the first time since I began my search timeless eons ago. A search that led me on all my life’s adventures. Oh my fucking god.

So, yes, my husband’s death was tragic. I would have wished for many more years of his physical presence, and remained as happy and blissful as I was. But, had he not died, I would not have found Me so intensely. And I would not have found You, either. Because now that I have found me, you seem so alive and amazing to me. It was a blessing that my dearly loved husband died, even if things that remind me of him still tear my heart up. Life is on my side. The Dark Force will never overpower me.
So, if there are any widows out there and if by any wild chance you find your way to my blog, I love you and send you goddess hugs and know, even if you don’t, that your pain will lead you to where you belong. It is a gift. There are no “supposed tos” attached to it. It’s your pain, and you get to choose what to do with it. Nobody else can tell you how to use it. Others can advise you (and they will), but only you can know. Your pain will only speak to you and will patiently wait until you are ready to reveal its secrets.